Who... moi?

Who... moi?
Originally uploaded by BayRoadPhoto/Laura.

Yes YOU... Out there raiding my bird feeders... Just remember.. I have another way to shoot you rather than just with my new telephoto lens... you freakin' tree rat!

So... after a full week of working at Wally World, what is my advice to you?

1. If you don't want something after you have put it in your cart, put it back where it BELONGS!! Don't want that cheesecake?? Here's a newsflash for ya... It does NOT belong stuffed alongside the pocket books... Decided against cheeseburgers for supper? The hamburg really shouldn't be left on top of the rack of flannel pjs... SHEESH... People are animals... animals I tell you...

2. When purchasing anything from ANY store... DO NOT apply it directly to your body... remove it from whatever packaging it comes in... place it gently in the washing machine... and select "BOIL" from the dial... Rinse... and REPEAT!

3. If you can't find what you need... find the clerk that looks the most bored... Chances are she's the one that's been there the longest and will be able to give you specific... precise... turn by turn directions... as to where you can find whatever it is you seek...

4. If you have been cleaning your house all day with an aerosol spray cleaner... DO NOT call your local store to find out if they have anything that will finish the job without making you any higher than you already are. You will be made fun of for using the phrase "like.. like.. like.. it's really smelly in here..." and then giggling... You will also be ignored while you ramble on in a completely stoned out manner.... but then.. it'll be ok... cause chances are you've killed off enough brain cells that you won't remember you ever made a phone call anyway...

5. DO NOT CONFUSE THE FITTING ROOM WITH THE REST ROOMS! The rest rooms have porcelin bowls with water in them and a handy roll of tissue to help finish the job.

Later...