OK.. so I was shopping with Santa when this Barbie furniture set just jumped off the shelf and screamed... GET ME!!! I refused to leave the store until Santa bought it for me... LOL... As we were walking through the mall, we stopped at the Dairy Queen for an ice cream... the girl behind the counter saw it and said "OH... that's awesome... how old is the girl that that is for?"... I happily replied... "I'm 44!" :)
If she didn't have a reason to be angry before, The Stupid Little Angry Dog™ has one now. LOL...
Even with 3 of the Stupid Little Angry Dog™ she's still no match for the amount of snow we've gotten in the past week.
Thanks so much for reading along this year!
My fingers are frozen. My arm is killing me. My harddrive is full of pictures of my empty hand. My camera battery is dead.
BUT IT WAS SO WORTH IT! :)
The ad for the d@ting service read:
Male celebrity seeking fem@le companion. I'm a warm, bouncy and cuddly 43 year old m@le who has starred in several made for TV movies and have found it difficult to meet women. I've recently been replaced at my job by a Dentist with a step ladder and am willing to relocate for the right wom@n.
Ok. So I knew that Jenny was probably gonna stink in the snow.
I knew that.
Really I did.
I mean she is rear wheel drive but I figured, we all used to drive rear wheel drive cars, and we all still made it where we needed to go, right? How bad can it be, I only have a 7 minute drive to work.
Enter the storm on Monday.
I managed to back out of my parking spot and thanks to gravity, made it down the hill through the woods that is my driveway. Stopping at the end of the driveway to check for traffic was my first mistake, however. Even tho it is perfectly flat, it took about 30 seconds of spinning my tires to get going again. OK. Not so good. But I DID get going again. Only to fishtail as I attempted the turn onto the road. Then it was more tire spinning as I tried for second gear. Followed by more fish tailing as the tires finally grabbed. Within 100 feet of the end of my driveway, I was looking for a spot to turn around. I found my spot, a nice flat side street. Downshifting back to first, however, resulted in yet more fish tailing, and apparently 3 miles an hour was still to fast for any application of the brakes as doing so simply sent me sideways and headed for the shrubbery rather than actually stopping. Luckily, tires aren't meant to be driven sideways so Jenny eventually did come to a full and complete stop and she even left me room to actually make the turn that I was attempting in the first place. Whew. Ok... so now it's a simple half circle at the end of the side street and I'll be headed back home. Thank goodness for her incredibly tiny turning radius. Another 30 seconds of tire spinning and a quick fishtail and I was on my way back home. Luckily there was no traffic coming now that I was back at the end of my driveway and I was able to just make my turn without anymore tire spinning delays and I was on the home stretch. Yay. Now there was nothing left to do but make it UP my driveway and the only way to do that was to gun it.
Faster and faster Jenny went with me hanging on for dear life.
Up and up we climbed.
We made it up the first little hill.
Negotiated that last little curve.
Up and up we went.
Up that last little hill.
Almost...
Just a little more...
Come on baby...
Come ON...
DOH!
And that was as far as she went.
We managed to stop in the middle of the top of the driveway. You know, exactly in the middle so that no one with a vehicle that is decent in the snow could make it past us in either direction.
Just. Freakin'. Perfect.
So now I was left with 2 choices. Either back all the way back down the driveway, or get my big strapping son out of bed and have him attempt to push me the rest of the way up the drive so other people could at least get past me.
Fifteen minutes later I'm driving Jenny again praying that she doesn't just get a mind of her own and take out the kid attached to my rear bumper. Oh. Wait. Did I say "driving". I meant spinning. Sorry.
Well. We did manage to get her out of the way and I even managed to make it to work. You know, in my son's little Ford Focus that frankly didn't fishtail or spin at all.
Not. Even. Once.
So. Basically. As bad as I knew Jenny was gonna stink in the snow, if I had taken that image and multiplied it by, oh, say, TEN. I might have been in the correct ball park.
Now, tell me this.
Anyone have a winter beater for sale?
The Stupid Little Angry Dog™ amazingly seems to really like her new coat. She will patiently wait while I apply it to her furry little body before going outside. I'm thinking if she didn't like it, it would:
A. Be impossible to find her when holding the coat.
B. Be a fight every time I try to apply it.
C. Be torn to shreds the second she is out of my sight.
D. All of the above.
And the winner is "D" "All of the above"... amazingly she really seems to like it. I know I do.. she looks hilarious out there running through the shrubbery. She doesn't even seem to notice that the barn cats are giggling at her behind her back.
A lovely trip through Rhode Island yesterday netted me 3 different lighthouses!
